20 Fabulous Unicorn T-Shirts That Won’t Dull Your Sparkle

by on May 18, 2017

If anyone tells you that you’re too old to love Unicorns, then leave them. You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life.

Unicorns are cool.

Just imagine: it’s a horse. Sure, it sparkles and it seems pure and beautiful, but it’s got a pointy spear of death on its head.  It’s fierce. It can kill you and still look fabulous while doing so. Definitely my kind of spirit animal.

From their beginnings in medieval folklore, humans have thought of unicorns as something untouchable, wise, and dangerous, but undeniably alluring. If you could kill a unicorn, you’d become immortal. The key operator here is ‘if’. It’s not easy to hunt down something that fast, that clever, and that deadly, and still make it out alive to tell the tale. Supposedly, the only way to lure the beast out of hiding was to get a maiden, because apparently they’re attracted to virginity. Weird, right?

These days, unicorns are a symbol of uniqueness. Little girls might be really obsessed with them, but that doesn’t mean we can’t be too. People living in the Middle Ages knew the truth: Unicorns are scary. They’ll impale you if you get too close.

Besides, why wouldn’t we be obsessed with something that scary and that fabulous?

And Deadpool likes unicorns. Deadpool knows what’s up.

“But unicorns don’t exist!” you might say. Yeah, well, have you seen rhinos? They’re just fat unicorns. How do you explain that?

…And there’s no denying that unicorns make everything cuter. I mean, look at this lil’ guy:

How can you not love that little face with that murderous horn? If unicorns can improve corgis, then they’re worth believing in.

PHOTO: Imgur

Unicorns teach us that it’s okay to be different. Just because you’re not like other horses (or humans) doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. In fact, it’s a good thing. Even if you’re a little weird, and you might poop rainbows and skewer unsuspecting dudes with the massive pointy object that grows out of your head, you can still be clever, wise, and highly sought-after.

If you’re a unicorn, you don’t care what anyone else thinks of you. You know that you’re awesome just the way you are, and that if others can’t handle it, that’s their problem.

Don’t let anyone tell you that unicorns are just for kids. Unicorns are for everybody. Unicorns are magical.

You know what?

You’re a unicorn.

Check out the rest of these fabulous unicorn t-shirts…

Written by

Elizabeth is a Portland-based freelance writer, who spends her time playing with her cat, blogging, working on the three-billion writing projects she has bouncing around in her brain, tutoring kids in writing and reading, and perusing the streets of Portland, looking for the best coffee shops and book shops.

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